Tuesday, August 2, 2011

My Decision

I totally have a decision to make, I've been wavering back and forth for months now. How does one choose between something they love and something they need?

I've been here before. I wavered to long. Yes it was a different type of sitch, but nevertheless it was something that I should have made a decision on when I realized it was going South. All the signs were there. I just kept making excuses for ba
d and insensitive behavior, holding onto something that isn't working anymore, just because it looks like something I really wanted. There is better out there for me.

This new sitch is not a human, but an entity and and of course, some of the humans in the entity :-). I dearly love it. It's been in my life for so long and I'm comfortable with it. It's seems like the best place to do what I truly love doing, but i thought that before. Sometimes the grass is greener on the other side when your current grass is just fucking dying. Go out and buy some more!!!

Ok, ok, what I'm saying is that I cannot let fear keep me bound in this sinking ship. I can do this on my own. I have such a wonderful plan. I don't want to be the coward that I saw before me before. I'm fucking worth it and my dream is worth it. I will not ditch myself. I will fight for happiness until I die.

I've made a decision!!!

I quit!!! LOL

1 comment:

Renni Wooden said...

You are such a dynamic woman, Elaine. I used to feel I lived in the wrong place. I needed to live were more progessive thinkers could appreciate me....I see you that way as well. I was trying to fit my square self in a round hole, and it just wasn't working.

You are so cool to me....love your insights....! xxoo